


Bender

by StarryNighty



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blackouts, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/M, Kidnapping, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sexual Assault, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:33:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24556963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarryNighty/pseuds/StarryNighty
Summary: Summary: Steve Rogers has picked up a bad habit, Asgardian spirits.Warnings: 18+, smut, non-con, dub-con, alcohol abuse, cheating, possible disturbing situations.A/N: Thank you to my bestie, @titty-teetee for reading through this story and hearing me out lol <3 You’re amazing!
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Black Reader, Steve Rogers/Reader
Comments: 16
Kudos: 50





	Bender

Lipstick the color of blood clots smudged against the argyle pattern of the pillow case. Steve’s vision dipped in and out while the bitter aftertaste of bile coated his throat. The flavor didn’t stop his thrusting and him being drunk did little to deter him either. The woman underneath his body writhed, she fought back too. Steve grated his teeth and with one sweaty palm he pushed her face further across the pillow. He spread his thighs wider, dug deeper in her as he pressed her face into the sheet and fucked her harder.

She felt strange. Her skin wasn’t as soft as he liked and something was wrong with how she moaned too, so he shut his eyes tight. Steve jammed his forearm into the back of her neck and thought of you.

With those sad, knowing eyes you had been giving him lately. That was his fault. With the hurtful, resentful tone you had when he drank too much that day. That was his doing, too. 

And how you hardly let him touch you anymore. 

Your face swam in these thoughts. The smell of you too. But that was most likely because here he laid, with Stark’s assistant, ignoring her pleas to go softer, right in the middle of the bed he shared with _you_.

Pounding this woman as if she were the one to blame for his mood. Wrenching her arm back, laughing at her tears, like she was the cause of his malaise. 

She wanted to fuck the Cap. Perfect soldier, the decent man that helped save the world was balls deep, almost there when her scream shattered into his thoughts. It cracked the facade, shook him up so much that he jerked away. Steve sat up, and at the same time the woman crawled to the floor from the bed. She rolled over on her ass and stared up at him.

He had seen that look before. Fear, shock–but he wasn’t used to seeing it directed at him.

Rolling up the waist of his sweats he barked down at her. 

“If you tell anybody about this-,” 

“I won’t.” she said with a muffled sob. “I’m leaving. I quit.” she said quickly and adjusted her clothing as she stood up. Steve’s eyes moved with her across the room. She never looked back again after grabbing her purse. 

He sat there on his knees until the front door slammed shut. His dick had gone soft and with it the fantasy of fucking a fan went limp. His willpower sagged too.

He glanced at the clock in the kitchen, another hour and you would be home. Steve moved the fridge away from the wall, there inside of a fist sized hole he pushed his hand through. 

He pulled a liter sized bottle back out, twisted off the cap and took a long pull of it. Asgardian spirits tasted like centuries old grain plastered in grape jelly. It went down hard but the rush was back. The sticky bitterness disappeared off his tongue and with that he felt nothing at all. Not the whiplash of resentment and guilt of living this long. And most importantly the fear of you finding out what happened today was washed away by another swig.

You wouldn’t hurt from what you didn’t know, he thought.

* * *

You looked like you had seen better days. The outline of your hair frizzed and muddled with the sleep in his eyes. Steve blinked sluggishly, with every pass your face became clearer and angrier.

 _How long have I been out?_ Steve sat up, his hand crunched underneath something hard and cold. 

_Where the fuck am I?_ His confusion spread as he looked from you back to where he was laying. The skin of his cheeks felt dry, it felt tight as he winced at the mess around him. _Was I crying?_

The smell of gasoline filled his nose, tools from the workbench wall were scattered between you and him. He was on the garage floor, but sat in a pile of parts that was probably of his own making. Nuts and bolts, long silver rods that once looked beautiful were twisted, as were the rest of the parts. Just to your left his eyes fell to the blue and red chassis of his bike, his favorite, it was once perfect but now it looked like a crushed beer can. 

You were saying something. But as his metabolism processed the booze, Steve couldn’t hear anything but the bang of his heartbeat in his head. He sat there watching your pouty lips curl and move fast. It wasn’t until you grabbed a bunch of tools off the workstation and threw them that he snapped out of the daze. 

The clang had him up, barefeet grazed patches of oil and dirt on the garage floor with little care to how unsteady he appeared to you. The racket stuck in his head and joined the ringing in his ears which in turn kicked off the anger. Maybe you saw it in his eyes, he thought and then ran dirty hands through equally dirty blond strands. You walked back out of the door that led to the house. And as he stared at the door one thought crossed his mind. _God, I need a drink_.

He just needed a taste, really. The hair of the dog, a little sip, something to knock off the rust in his mind from the night before, so he could really get started for the day. And he could be the man you fell in love with again. _Yes, I’ll be the man of her dreams_ , Steve promised himself.

Steve walked to the cabinet just above the work-station. He threw aside a roll of paper towels, and behind it sat a mason jar of Thor’s secret brew. Steve took a big sip of it. The burn on his lips satisfied parts of him he didn’t even know existed. The pieces of him he held close to the vest cheered that this had an effect on him at all. But the other, the torn and tattered wisps of dignity, plummeted toward despair. And he took another, a deeper drink and placed the lid back on. 

And just when he thought the verbal lashing was over, you returned. He shut the door in time to meet the fierceness in your eyes. 

“What the fuck is this?”

You balled up a piece of cloth in your hands and threw at his face. He snatched it out of the air, he glanced at it before letting it fall to the floor. 

Steve shrugged like it didn’t matter. But he saw it as sure as he knew you had seen it too. The swipe of lipstick you never wore. 

Steve rolled his eyes and began to shuffle passed you. And with him being so near the unmistakable odor of alien liquor caught your nose. Your eyes glanced over his features, his eyes were pinpoints--skin dampening in the few seconds that you observed him.

“You’re just a drunk, pathetic.” you sniped back. 

He stopped short of walking behind you. Steve glanced at the door to the house, not bothering to look at you, he spoke. 

“At least,” he said at first softly. “I wanted to work on it. I came back, for you.”

Steve turned his head to look at you, bringing the full force of repressed anger down on you and yelled in your face. 

**“You didn’t even try!”**

There it was again. The same argument with the very same root of his resentment. You shook your head with a snarl and started to speak but Steve began to walk off.

But you didn’t let him. You stepped up to his right and held his thick upper arm, daring him to look you in the eyes.

“So was she better than me?” you growled. “Did she-”

Steve shook you off in the middle of your tirade. But you were still there, a voice echoing off cement walls. You quickly walked back up to him and held his arm between shaky hands.

“You cheated on me! **ME** \- Steve!” your voice cracked with the shout but he didn’t stop. “I like nobody in this world, not even myself sometimes,” You yanked back on his arm but it did nothing. “But I gave you a chance the first time we met and then I took a chance again when you came back!” 

Steve flicked his arm so quickly you stumbled back hitting your hip hard on the workstation corner. You started to sob openly after that. Right there, with his back turned to you, tears slid down your face. _Fuck that_. Suddenly you sprinted the few steps to the stairs of the door. You used your momentum to push yourself forward, shoving Steve square in the back as he entered the laundry room. 

“You think I’m stupid?” you hissed and then after that, no words from you were uttered.

Steve whipped around as you moved to go passed him deeper into the house. He snapped you back to him by the wrist colliding you with his body. Steve pushed his crusty dry lips on top of yours. He was stronger and made use of it by forcing you face first over the washer to his left. 

In the tussle you thought of your safety. Certainly the one person you loved the most on Earth wouldn’t hurt you? And as Steve ripped at your pants you relinquished the question to the fact that he had already done so. If it hadn’t been the cheating then it was the drinking, the swearing at you, the late nights. And all because you had abandoned him to his emotions. But he had left you first, and in more ways than one. 

You tried to crank your arm back forward from behind but Steve was there, twisting and forcing you to a submissive position. 

He had been determined to go back to Peggy. To return to that shit ‘40’s timeline to live out a fantasy. Even after he had married you first.

It wasn’t your fault that after he returned you refused to see him. 

That you denied him entry back into your life and heart.

_Steve loved you._

“You wanna know how it felt for her?” he choked out between grunts. Steve yanked down his sweats and no sooner did you feel him at your entrance was he buried within you. He felt hot inside you, the fright, icy and left you numb. 

_Steve chose you._

Steve leaned over your body and jabbed in harder than before. He took his right hand, pressed it to your forehead and dragged your face up from the cool surface of the metal.

“You want to be my whore?” he whispered vehemently. 

Shame replaced your fear as Steve’s breath fanned over your face. 

“Is that what it takes to get your attention?” he accused and smashed his hips in at a brutal pace against you. “I’ve missed you too, so much sweetheart…” 

Steve squeezed your wrists hard, it felt like bone on muscle on iron to the point you cried out. He didn’t let go, Steve ignored it, he continued to hold your forehead forcing you to arch your back.

Your pussy ached, it dripped, to your embarrassment around him. Steve took it as yielding. He accepted your body’s reaction as obedience and continued to assault you.

Steve’s chest pressed against your shoulder blades, the three day grow of his beard scratched against your temple. “-You think this pussy is ready?” he groaned.

You knew what he meant before he uttered another word. Your eyes widened as your shoulders tried to shake loose of his control. 

“No protection this time honey. You haven’t been taking that shit for months.” 

Steve’s hand slipped from your forehead and moved to the back of your head. He smashed your face into the metal and stood up straight. He held you there, pinned under his weight and emptied his balls into you.

And when it was over, Steve let you go. Your arms fell limp back to the surface of the washer as his soft steps faded away to another part of the house. Shaky hands pulled off what was left of your cotton shorts and panties to the floor. 

You walked aimlessly back through the kitchen with your mind stuck on how carelessly he had treated you. And once in the living room there sat Steve, perched on the edge of the couch with his head bowed into his hands. 

Steve dragged his face over his hands, fingers over his mouth he stared at you. And when he started to shake his head, when unshed tears made his eyes look like blue black marbles-- you turned from him.

You entered the room you shared with him without a glance to the bed and put on a pair of old leggings. Slipping on shoes, you grabbed your wallet and keys. 

Teary eyes stayed forward as you walked from the room, through the living room where Steve still sat, and then without looking back left the house.

* * *

_Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding_

Steve awoke to blood coating the vision in his right eye and the taste of it in his mouth. His head laid crooked against the shoulder of the passenger side seat. Steve remembered leaving his house this morning clearly. Or was that yesterday morning? He couldn’t tell which. He just knew it had been weeks since he last saw you. But as his one clear eye rolled to the cracked and shattered windshield, darkness was broken by the beams from the truck's headlights. 

_How did I get here?_

Steve forced his body into a sitting position back behind the wheel. Covered in glass, leaves and a few twigs he dragged himself out of the truck. Which was easy enough because the drivers side door was missing completely. The dinging of the vacant door combined with the cry of pistols scraping on metal within a damaged engine. 

_How long can I keep doing this?_

Steve stumbled through brush a few feet from his smashed truck. He wiped at the cut roughly while mist swirled around his ankles with every step. At the nearest tree, he turned around and leaned against it and then stared at the buckling paint of the hood. Fog began to roll in, it took back the space until the soft glow engulfed the truck. You had said he picked out the most bland truck on the lot. It was the color of daisy petals, not quite white but dull enough to be ignored. Boring. But now, even you couldn’t say this looked particularly dreary. 

You were very much not like him in all the right ways. Steve slunk down the bark of the tree to his ass and let the fog swallow him too. He wiped at the blood over his eye again and felt the high of the buzz fade away. You weren’t like Peggy at all either. _Thank God_ , he thought and sloughed off his leather jacket. She didn’t have an off switch. You had passion, pride, but you also knew when it was time to pull back and reassess. Peggy had nothing on you and he was glad that he returned back to you. 

The whine of the engine was growing louder. Steve listened closer, it sounded so human. Hell, maybe even his truck was asking him for peace. He tilted his head back against the tree and began to create excuses to hit Bucky with before he would inevitably call him for a ride. In an instant the thought was gone because screams erupted from the forest around him. Steve’s eyes shifted from the hood of his truck wrapped around a tree to the other end. Another round of shouts and panicked screams once again field the space. 

Steve stood up fast, too fast, the gash above his eye poured as he looked at the covered bed of his truck. Holding his head he slowly walked over to it, the cries continued as he pulled down the hatch. They stopped immediately. 

_What have I done?_

It was too dark to see who it was, but the smell--the rosey vanilla soap you loved came to him first. Steve reached in, grabbed for whatever he could grasp first and pulled. 

He slid you out feet first over the edge of the hatch. Eyes wide you stared at him, blood dripped from a splint in your lip but you looked fine, not hurt.

Steve thanked whoever watched over lost causes, as his voice fumbled. “Baby,” he untied your ankles and then wedged himself between your legs to untie your wrists too. He held your face afterwards, you weren’t talking instead you shook all over. He hugged you and there was no response to that either. 

“What--” He kissed your cheek, deeply and held his lips there. 

There was no use asking how you got there. He knew exactly how, and possibly _why_. 

“I’m so sorry.” he mumbled and held you tighter, still nothing. “Please, say something.” he asked gently. 

Steve pulled back up and he looked upon the fear in your eyes. 

“I’m not- I won’t hurt you. Baby…”

“You could have stayed in 1943.” you said with a shake in your voice. _He should have spent his life there_ , you thought. You would have been heartbroken, sure, but at least it would have healed with time. 

“I took you back though.” Your voice had an unmistakable, _fuck you_ , tone to it that Steve picked up fast. 

“You weren’t wrong.” Steve interjected quickly. 

Before you catch the words, they blurted out. “I came back to you when thought I was pregnant!” 

The truth was strong enough to allow you to push him aside. Dizzily you jumped off and hit the dark soil wobbly. You stared at Steve, but then slowly as you stepped backward, your eyes drifted to the truck. 

“When I got back,” said Steve hurt, he held his hand over his heart and took a step forward. 

“I knew it would be hard for us. I didn’t think you would hide-”

“Shut up!” you yelled and started to follow the path of wreckage out of the fog, trees and brush. "I'm sorry I pushed you away!” you shouted over your shoulder, “But this doesn't work anymore!" 

“Where are you going?” Steve called after you but you didn’t stop. You tried not to focus on the wild beating of your heart and find a way out. But he was faster than you could ever be. He rushed up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist. “Sweetheart..” he whispered in your ear.

“Just one more chance,” he hissed and wrestled with your wrists. “I won’t let you down.” he heatedly insisted. 

You panted hard while attempting to pry out of his grip. Sucking and heaving the air down to burning lungs and you tried to think with certainty. Anything but what was going through your mind. Which was nothing but the animalistic fear of prey being captured. Your eyes hurriedly roamed the area around you. Trees for miles, and fog cut through by headlights mimicked the shapes of ghostly people. 

Steve stopped your walking completely. He wrapped one arm around your waist and the other across your chest. He pressed the side of his face against yours and said, “And I remember why we’re out here.”

Steve began to drag you back toward the truck on your heels. “Whatever secrets you have.” He jerked you around, spinning you on the balls of your feet to look at him. “You can tell me, okay?” he assured.

Steve cupped your face, he pressed his lips onto yours, smearing your blood into his mouth with a kiss. You tried to step away but Steve was there with his hands coasting down your back pulling your body back to him. He brushed his hips forward, pushing his hardening cock against your thigh.

“I’m going to fight for us,” he said quickly. “No more drinking too.”

Frightened but unable to look away you watched Steve switch gears. He looked around the forest, the stars and then back to you. 

“That’s why I brought us here. To work it out. It was too noisy, too many distractions. Do you know what we need sweetheart?” 

You said nothing as dread pressed your gut into a pit. Steve turned you around toward a seemingly empty, pitch black, forest. He stepped to your side and held your left hand within his.

“We need a reset. And we are going to stay there until we find love again.”

Even with his voice leveling out into a more stable tone, his eyes shifted wildly as he scanned the trees. Hesitantly, you reached for his arm, pliantly you caressed it. “I already love you. That wasn’-”

Steve shook his head and began to walk you into the darkness. When you stalled, he snatched you to walk in stride alongside him. Again you pulled on his grip but he brought your hand up to his mouth. He kissed your knuckles with a long languid brush of his lips.

Steve’s eyes appeared to caress the features of your face. “I’ll be the man you deserve.” 

“You already are,” you said and brushed his arm once again. “Let’s go back home, please.”

Steve pulled you along. Your voice now small, terrified of the dark and what awaited you in it, whispered. 

“Whatever this is Steve, we can work on it at home.” 

He did not look at you and simply nodded as the last of the head lights glowed in his strands like that of a halo. He squeezed your hand tighter and patted the top of it.

“There’s a beautiful cabin a few miles away, just waiting for a woman’s touch. A wife’s touch.” said Steve lightly and waved his hand indiscriminately ahead of him. 

“We are _home_ sweetheart, together.”


End file.
